These are a few things that you can do in someone else’s presentation:
1) Without looking at the bottom of the slide, try to guess the total number of slides.
2) Try praying to god to create hindrances in the ongoing presentation. This will prove to you whether god loves to listen to your prayers or not. If the presentation encounters a problem, you can smirk and wink looking at the ceiling to thank god for listening to your prayers. Now that you know that God is in a good mood to listen to your prayers, make sure that ask for more favors from God. Ask for a better job, salary, onsite opportunity, good raise, promotion, no work, a beautiful girl/handsome guy in your team…etc…
3) Be a critic. In real life you won’t get many chances to criticize someone else or someone else’s work product. Presentations are a great place to realize your wish of becoming a critic. Try to find out flaws with the content or logic in the slides.
4) Show off. PPTs are a great place to show off your knowledge, creativity and innovativeness. Whenever you get a chance to point out an alternate way to reach a solution, do so. Managers normally don’t attend the Presentations to learn the domain or to understand a problem. Presentations are a great platform for the managers to know who in the team is contributing how much! So, make sure that you do come up with alternate solutions; in short Showoff!
5) Take revenge. Normally, in office, you would meet people who you hate and whose names figure in your “I am gonna screw (not literally) him/her” list. So make sure that you go through the PPT before your opponent’s actual presentation. This will help you in coming up with unanswerable questions which will surely stump the presenter and then you can smirk at his/her helplessness! In short outsmart your presenter.
6) Appreciate the PPT. A normal human being that you are, you would have a heart. Right?.... Someday even you could give a good PPT. There is an old saying “Give X to get X”. So make sure that you appreciate good PPTs.
7) Blame the boring PPT for world recession. Think of adequate reasons.
8) Act as if you are taking notes and then keep enhancing your sketching skills. Try towards fulfillment of your childhood dream of becoming a good sketch-artist.
9) Try learning Short-Hand…Imagine how difficult it must be for newspaper reporters to note what top-officials have to say in press conferences!
10) Try switching off your ears and then lip-read the presenter.
11) Now close your eyes and try imagining the contents of the PPT and the body language of the presenter.
12) Try to read and understand the body language of others who are attending the PPT and gauge if others and you are on the same level of boredom. Think of some test that you could make other attendees take to determine who topped the ‘boredom’ table!
13) Look at your manager. Learn how he suppresses his urge to dash away from the room because of the bland PPT.
14) Scribble enough on your notepad to show that you were very much interested in the PPT and then keep that page open when you get back to your desk. Bosses love employees with scribbled notes!
15) Jot down points that you like to copy from the on-going presentation to your presentation(if you happen to give someday)
16) Imagine that you are BILL GATES and imagine dressing down the presenter for disrespecting MICROSOFT-PPT by making such a worthless PPT.
17) Send some SMSes to your colleagues in the meeting room.
18) Come out with fake laughs which you can use when the presenter is trying to crack some apparently witty jokes.
19) Try some neck exercises. That will make the presenter feel that you are concurring with his points.
20) If you are bored with the PPT, take your mobile close to your ears and so “hello…hello…1 min…” and then go out of the room. Make sure your mobile is on SILENT mode to avoid any humiliation out of any chance of your mobile ringing when you are faking your monologue “hello…hello…1 min…”!
21) Try doing a [1]SHAVAASAN* if you are really bored with the PPT. you can’t help if the PPT is realllllllllly bad. God save your soul!
22) Keep OBSERVING the people around you to see if there is anyone else who shares the same feeling as you do.
23) Unnecessarily smile at some colleague of yours. This will create a mystery in his/her mind and also a mystery in the minds of others who were busy OBSERVING you. This will give rise to the energy level in the room.
24) Look at your watch 2- 3 times in 1 minute. This will make the presenter realize that you are getting bored and maybe he will try to cut down a few slides from the PPT.
25) Try verifying whether the speed with which you can count 60 seconds in a minute is the same as the actual time your watch takes.
26) Roll your tongue on your teeth and count the number of teeth. If you make even a small mistake, re-do the counting!
27) Get up and go to the pantry to have a cup of coffee.
28) Try to recollect who invented the projector. If you are not able to recollect the name, SMS your friends. Whoever replies back with the right answers wins the farthest seat in the next presentation!
29) If you get really bored, start coughing loudly. That will make others look at you as if you were doing a Salsa on a funeral! A gentleman/lady that you are, your will leave the room so that you don’t disturb others. And you can then heave a sigh of relief! Sit on your desk. Check mails. Play games for 15 minutes and then again join the group of morons attending the utterly disgusting PPT.
30) If the presenter is pissed off on you, then say words like “oh…yes..” or “ yes..right..ok..” or “oho… understood”…or “ok…got it”… This will surely make him believe that you are trying to pay attention; whereas actually speaking, you were thinking about point number 36!
31) In case your boss notices that you were not paying attention to the PPT, be sure that you ask the presenter question like “ok…I understood what you said…but how will that work in our system?.. I mean we have X and you are suggesting Y… so I am a LITTLE confused… could you please elaborate?”
32) Try to recollect phone numbers of your dear friends. If you are not able to recollect, check the address-book in your phone and then try to memorize…even then if you are not able to keep the phone number in your mind, then don’t try any further …just give up...! You must surely be one of those who had read only the MOST EXPECTED QUESTIONS TO BE ASKED IN AN INTERVIEW!
33) Stare at your palm and then see what evil deed did you do to deserve such a boring PPT!
34) Think of changing the company
35) Play old games like FLAME, X and O, etc.
36) Play games on your mobile
37) Try to recollect the headlines of that day’s newspaper.
38) Try to visualize the PPT in a slow-motion.
39) There’s a popular saying – “bad things happen to bad people”. Try to analyze whether you are a bad person and if YES, then to what extent so as to deserve such a criminal waste of your precious time (which otherwise you could have used to play TT, play computer games, sleep…etc)?
40) Think like an interior designer and think of changes that you could have brought to the room where the PPT is going on.
[1] Shavaasan is a form of YOGA wherein you just try to lose track of the things going around and just relax your brain, if you have one!
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